Yikes, am I raising a bully?

Emma and I went to a play date yesterday, and while I enjoy meeting all the other moms and see Emma interact with the other kids, I am beginning to see a whole different side of Emma and quite frankly, it is kind of scary....

Emma is a big baby, that is a fact. Her doctor says she is just right and follows her developmental path, which is a great thing. I heard from the get go not to compare her to other children her age because they are all different and develop differently depending on their genes. Well, with that said, Emma is still a large baby. She is in the 99th percentile for her height and 81 percentile for weight.

When I went to our weekly play group yesterday, I (of course) compared her to the other babies there. And she is twice their size. Twice their size!!! Can you imagine. There was only one boy there, and he is about a month younger than Emma, and she is even bigger than him. And he is considered very large for his age. In addition to her size she is kind of a bully too. She just crawled over (or more specifically scooted over) to the other kids and keep stealing their toys. If they didn't give them up right away, she sat on them until they gave up and handed them over. None of the other kids did that. They played quietly in their corner and minded their own business. Emma even took their binky right out of their mouths and put it in hers like it was the most natural thing in the world. Then of course the other kids started crying and all of a sudden we had an orchestra of crying babies and one happy Emma....

While some moms there thought this was hilarious, it honestly worried me a little. Am I raising a bully or is she just expressing her independent self? One mom there sensed my worry and kindly said: "You will never have to worry about Emma because she will be able to take care of herself." And then she made a hulk-face, flexed her biceps and laughed...If this was any other kid, it would be kind of a funny story. But when it's your own baby, you have a tendency as a mom to paint the worst picture. And guess what I was painting? Emma going berserk in school and winning the "worst bully award"! I want Emma to be socialized and well-behaved when she plays with other children. I want her to have a bunch of friends too, and I am pretty sure that most friendships among girls will end when there's too much sitting and wrestling going on. Luckily, the other moms in the play group are fun and easy going. Most of them are first time moms like me, so there's quite a bit of understanding and empathy going on.

As I drove home a few hours later I thought about how to handle this situation in the future. I concluded that while I want Emma to grow up to be independent and empowered, I also want her to be sensitive and understanding to other people's needs. The answer was pretty obvious when I looked at her. I know that the responsibility lays completely on me and my husband. We need to be what we want her to be. After all, we all learn from observing, and if my husband and I are good role models, always consistant in our behaviors, and come from a place of love and support, I think we are going to be alright...