Living in the moment...

It wasn't as easy to write about staying present as I had thought it would be. Lots of thoughts and things to reflect upon, though. I hope you will find some of this stuff interesting and perhaps even relating to your own life...

Living in the moment has always been a personal challenge for me. I am one of those people who get very excited about things, and I tend to live in the future more than in the present. I always set many goals for myself and work step by step toward attaining each and every one of them. Today I am proud to say that I have achieved every single goal I have ever set for myself. I finished school, I got a degree in Psychology, I moved to the US, I got married, I bought a house, I started my own business, and I had Emma.

Having goals and something to look forward to was kind of my reason for living in a way. The last goal I set for myself was becoming pregnant and having a baby. I thought that becoming a mom would be the end destination, and I would finally be able to rest and stay grounded. But what happened was while I was pregnant with Emma, I felt like I lost my calling in a way. I had been so focused for so many years on becoming pregnant that once I was there, I was done. I had reached my ultimate goal. So, now what? Naturally as a Life Coach I was looking for my next goal and the best path to achieve it, but I wasn't able to find it. I simply had no idea of where to go from there...

This realization kept my up many nights. Having goals and something to strive for had been my identity for so long , and now that I finally achieved everything on my list, in a weird way I felt more lost than ever before. I kind of lost the essence of Jenny, if that makes sense. So, on one hand I had fulfilled my dream of becoming a mother to this beautiful and wonderful baby girl. On the other hand, I had lost my soul or my very essence as my dreams and goals for the future no longer dominated my life.

As time passed and Emma grew older, I noticed I started getting excited about things again. I was looking forward to getting out of the house. I was looking forward to our trip back to Sweden this Christmas, and I was also looking forward to all the play dates I signed up for. But most of all, I was looking forward to starting my new business, Tittut Baby. And I realized something very important right there. The goals, i.e. the future, are great to have because they fulfill a purpose and serve as a sense of direction. And it's equally important to live in the moment and appreciate what is now because that's where the journey is. I need my goals to feel whole and complete. But I also need to learn to live right here and now because that's where life takes place. If I always look forward and always dream about what's coming next, I will miss out on everything that's going on in this very moment.

As I was practising this realization earlier today, I looked over at Emma where she was playing on the living room floor. The moment my eyes met hers I knew that I had got it. There's just no question about living in the moment when you're with your children. They are forcing you to stay fully present whether you want or not. Children are masters of living in the moment. For them there is simply nothing but the present. Everything they want and need is right here. Tat is truly a magical gift, and I hope that it's something that Emma will learn to keep as she grows older.

As for me, who knows? Right now all I know is that I am able to stay fully present with her while I am also dreaming about and planning for my business. I guess the trick is to appreciate the present like you do when you are with your children, and when the kids are off to bed, like Emma is now :0), dive into your goals and all the other exciting things you have planned for the future...